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Greetings everyone. I did complete my sixth treatment last Thursday and am finally coming out of my chemo fog. I wish I could say how relieved and happy I am feeling because I finished my last chemo, but unfortunately my CA-125 test last week went from 53 to 159 which is not the right direction. Dr. Yamada has been out of town and so the doctor on call said to go through with my last treatment to see what happens. So this is what we did.
What does this mean? Well, it means that I take another CA-125 test September 16th when I go and see Dr. Yamada and then we see what the situation is. The CA-125 is all about the trend vs. an individual number. Could the number be an anomaly? Yes, but not likely. What is likely (being the expert that I am) is that I am becoming resistant to the chemotherapy I am on. This is not unusual but I was hoping it would not happen to me. So far, this treatment has been very successful coming down from a CA-125 of 1934 to 53 in four treatments. We were all surprised with the last test results.
I have many options going forward (different chemo treatments/clinical trials) so I will keep everyone posted on what happens. I am feeling disappointed and scared, but by no means down and out. I have been doing this now since April and I was letting myself get excited about some time in remission and now, I just don’t know. I remember how much pain I was in prior to chemo and really don’t want to be there again and of course, I want to live longer and live with some quality. The past days have been hard but as I start to feel physically better, my mental state improves as well.
That is it for now – I know how much all of you are supporting me through this and I feel bad to have to write less than great news. As my friend Hien told me, it is ok to lose a battle here and there as long as I win the war.
With Love,
Marissa
What does this mean? Well, it means that I take another CA-125 test September 16th when I go and see Dr. Yamada and then we see what the situation is. The CA-125 is all about the trend vs. an individual number. Could the number be an anomaly? Yes, but not likely. What is likely (being the expert that I am) is that I am becoming resistant to the chemotherapy I am on. This is not unusual but I was hoping it would not happen to me. So far, this treatment has been very successful coming down from a CA-125 of 1934 to 53 in four treatments. We were all surprised with the last test results.
I have many options going forward (different chemo treatments/clinical trials) so I will keep everyone posted on what happens. I am feeling disappointed and scared, but by no means down and out. I have been doing this now since April and I was letting myself get excited about some time in remission and now, I just don’t know. I remember how much pain I was in prior to chemo and really don’t want to be there again and of course, I want to live longer and live with some quality. The past days have been hard but as I start to feel physically better, my mental state improves as well.
That is it for now – I know how much all of you are supporting me through this and I feel bad to have to write less than great news. As my friend Hien told me, it is ok to lose a battle here and there as long as I win the war.
With Love,
Marissa
posted by Marissa at
8:34 AM
2 Comments:
hello dear, so good to hear of your coming out of it. It is just another battle - you can do it. Stand tall. Thinking and praying for you, always. Love, angie
By
Angie Ng, at 10:09 AM
Marissa, I am sorry to hear that the latest # is not where you wanted it to go, but I hope that Dr. Yamada will have better than you might expect news next week. You are an amazing person and I pray that you will get better life quality soon. Veronika
By
Anonymous, at 11:01 AM
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